"Write what should not be forgotten," -Isabel Allende
Love is something that writers of all kinds write about - but when instant love dominates the media, I get concerned that screenwriters and authors have no idea what actual love is like.
So here are my tips to writing real love between two people, not instant attraction between two archetypes. Since I obviously know everything about everything, I am going to give you three tips for writing better love in your novels, whether it be a subplot or the focus of your story.
Just like in any relationship, time has to be taken to get to know the other person. While I realize that instant attraction is a real thing, rarely, if ever, does it turn into love, and this is when instant attraction becomes instant love. However, this shows poor writing skills when a love story is forced and the relationship is never developed
1. Relationship, then romantics.
Just like in any relationship., time has to be taken to get to know the other person. While I realize that instant attraction is a real thing, rarely, if ever, does it turn into love, and this is when instant attraction becomes instant love. However, this shows poor writing skills when a love story is forced and the relationship is never developed as it naturally would.
The two characters in the relationship must begin their journey with a straight up friendship. Even if they go into the relationship with romantic intentions, the two characters must start off with amiable interactions. Flirting is a-okay, and that is a part of developing a relationship. People do not just fall in love because of a few, steamy encounters. People fall in love because they spend time with that other person and they get to know them and they care about them, which leads them to think 'wow, I really like this person, and not just as a friend', which leads me into my next point:
2. Sexual Tension
This one is key, however most people go overboard with the physical aspect of love. One thing that makes a romance entertaining to read is the tension we feel when the two characters dance in the rain - but then a honking car interrupts them. When he leans in, and she smiles, and then one of them sneezes. The tension that we see in their actions make it all the more satisfying when they finally do kiss, or whatever the romantic (or even sexual) climax comes and we get that relief and then fans all over the world scream.
It's important to not only have your characters mentally attracted to each other (enjoying one another's company, meshing well with the other's personality, finding the other person funny/entertaining/engaging) but they also must be sexually/physically attracted. These two components make up complete human attraction to another in terms of *ahem* marriage material.
3. Devotion and Why
What makes love - friendship love, family love, and romantic love - so special is because it contains devotion. Devotion is two people committing themselves to one another, and mentally and physically proclaiming that even when sh*t hits the fan, they will have the other's back. There has to be some level of devotion and vulnerability in any written relationship, or it will seem distant and forced. This is because the characters have to care about each other. They have to care if something bad is going to happen to said person. And, delving even deeper, we have to know why they care. Is it because they feel responsibility for that person? Is it because they are afraid of losing them? Is it because they don't want that other person to be hurt? The three levels of this step are crucial: devotion, and then caring, and then the why behind all of this.
If you can master these three steps, I guarantee that you'll have an in depth, realistic romantic relationship between your two characters.
Love on,
~The WordShaker
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